i miss jpmc!

n those requests... and the glee-ful abandon... and the thrill of doing nothing really...

and the beautiful ladies maybe?

New realizations & beginnings

It tremendously aggrevated my sense of loss.. nostalgia struck me much harder... and the part in me which wants to cling to the comfort of the old really wanted to run back to the maximum city and claim... that.. which had been rightfully mine... all these 24 yrs... when i thought of how she would leave for college this morning... would go sit in a class.. snooze through a couple of lectures... and then go out on a coffee break.. chit-chat in the canteen.. get done sometime in the afternoon.. and come back to the comfort of home.. and have the whole evening to yet plan something with friends...

suddenly then... i am reminded.. that my day's in college stretched past-mid-night on most occassions.. also... the only bonding we did do.. was me n him... sitting on that lil ledge outside the canteen... with our sleepy-stoned looks.. unnecessarily long hair... loose clothes and a condescending attitude towards every mortal we could lay our eyes on..

the oblivion towards every mortal who could snatch a whiff of oxygen in that over-crowded space that was best meant for a batch of 100 and best utilized by scores of 16 yr old's instead..

the abondon of presentations... the pointlessness of theory... that had no practical application.. which is also sadly not very true.. when you actually start working... and the utter disdain with which we regarded all people that would take anything seriously or put too much effort into any important activity..

when the to-do lists of the day or week .. were about paying the credit card and phone bills.. the lies to tell to cover the inflated fuel bills (something tells me the bills will yet remain just as integral part of my life now.. as then) and which movie to see... with which of them... today.. there are no movies and there are no companions.. maybe its only fair?

and then suddenly.. through this cloud of nostalgia and feeling bad about all that we missed out on... as a silver-lining or maybe a whole new spin on life.. we see the reality of finally moving away from home.. finally renting out a 2bhk.. where you would live alone.. .and be responsible for locking the door.. shutting the taps and switching off the lights.. also... where you can lay down quitely in your bed and not have to think why will anyone come and ask you something.. and will you have to come up with an answer?

and then... the meeting new people.. who were so much fun.. that they so very easily become friends? of seeing new places and experiencing a new cities customs.. .from tram's to metro's...

of going to yet more interesting places and meeting yet more interesting people.. of broadening your horizons from a city to a country suddenly... of finding inter-connectivity at the national level ;) ;)

of people actually thinking you know something.. and your opinion really counts.. where there is a reward... even if only notional.. linked to the awareness or interest shown by people..

there's a lot of missing the old.. the comfortable.. the easy.. and there is just so much excitement of experiencing this new and observing the changes as they happen....

from being a sad post... about missing my dhiraj cuppa.. this post is suddenly enjoying the kulhad tea and jhal-mudi!

Ode to home...

the last sprint down marine drive
the last drinkin binge of a night
the last night with friends...
the last sun-set

the last sound sleep
in the comfort of my bed

the last warm glass of milk
early in the morning

the last of waking up without alarms!
no gleeful abandon and carelessness

the last drive....
oh so swift....

the last of... student life
of life-long friends...
of relationships and memories

of bumping into acquaintances
every corner and street

the last of lasts
the new shall now last

n i may move physically geographies
but my soul from this city.. shan't depart!